


Hall of Mirrors

by that_runneth



Category: Tron (Movies), Tron - All Media Types, Tron: Betrayal
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-18
Updated: 2020-03-18
Packaged: 2021-03-01 00:54:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,680
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23196640
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/that_runneth/pseuds/that_runneth
Summary: A take on the 'what if Sam's visit on the Grid in Legacy was not his first?' prompt
Relationships: Jordan Canas/Kevin Flynn, Kevin Flynn/Tron
Comments: 6
Kudos: 24





	Hall of Mirrors

I.

_Now I feel like I’m losing it all._

There were always two separate histories ever since Sam could remember; two ways to tell the lore, two different sets of memories. One above and one below, one painted with warmer colors and the other with steel black and neon.

_That’s why I need to do this. It’s about taking care of the things **I made**. _

Loss and sadness belonged to one universe; it was the mundane one, where one would wait forever and reach no resolution at the end. Happiness could be cut up unexpectedly and people could walk out the door never to return.

_When Jordan was alive it all worked so well. There was a balance. ENCOM, the Grid, home life. It all fit together. We could do anything._

~~Jordan~~ Mommy belonged to the world above. Her presence was forever intertwined with the taste of warm milk and cookies and the certainty of her being there in the next room should little Sam wake up from a bad dream in the middle of the night. Eternal, even if one day she would not come home; an event that would send their lives into a downward spiral.

“Hey, Babe. I told you I’d bring Sam by on his birthday. It was last week. I’m late, like normal,” his father said. He was talking to Mommy, but she was not here; when little Sam looked around he could only see the empty graveyard and he became fussy.

“Daddy, can we go?” he asked.

II.

The other kind of timekeeping starts soon after the fall. In contrast to their regular lives ~~responsibilities, death, questions, past tense,~~ this existence is relief ~~freedom, life, present tense~~. It begins at night after a long, stressful day. They are home and Dad is talking to somebody on the phone.

“India has China’s population with no language barrier. And they’re a democracy,” he is insisting. “What’s the problem?”

“Daddy, I don’t feel good,” little Sam says. They woke up late that day and they had leftover for breakfast; now he feels sick and irritated.

“Just a minute, Alan,” Daddy says and he turns to Sam. “Come here, kiddo.”

He picks up little Sam just in time for his son to get sick and throw up all over the contract his father holds in his hand.

“Alan, let me call you back,” Dad says and he hangs up the phone. Later Grandma and Grandpa stop by with groceries and little Sam hears Grandpa and Dad from the other room.

“Maybe you should just step away,” Grandpa says. “Jordan was okay with the way you work, but Sam will only be young once.”

Later Dad speaks to somebody at the company again and he yells on the phone.

That night he tells Sam to get ready to go out. It is late, but little Sam is happy and full of unspent energy. They get dressed and Dad drives them to the Arcade. The place is dark and closed, but Dad unlocks the door and they get in: they have the whole place for themselves! Sam is too small to have played with the games, but he loves the Arcade, the chaotic energy, the smell of popcorn, the laughter. The place is now quiet and instead of turning on the lights, Dad leads him to the machine in the corner. The sign on the gaming machine reads TRON, a name little Sam has heard so many times. He doesn’t know what it means, but it is something which has been part of his world forever. A single thread in the texture of reality; hard to spot, yet has it been pulled out, the whole structure would crumble. Daddy walks to the machine and instead of putting a coin inside and starting it he pulls the machine aside and reveals a hidden door behind. Little Sam’s jaw drops, but this is good, this is better than anything: this is a game with hidden trapdoors, dark staircases and secret dungeons – this is a game, where there is no place for sadness or death.

Downstairs there is a room with a desk, tables, shelves and machines Sam does not recognize. Dad walks to the machine and works for a while. Then he picks Sam up and he walks in the middle of the room.

“Close your eyes for a moment, buddy,” Dad says and when little Sam looks again, they are far away.

III.

From that point on they live in two worlds; the days are unchanged and there is work and learning, but at nights they are in the Arcade. Down there is an endless night and the light is white and blue neon. Cars and motorcycles cruise on the roads and freeways with breathtaking speed; people in extravagant, shiny suits walk on the streets. First little Sam sticks to his father, looking around curiously, just to ease up quickly following a genuine welcome from the people of this strange realm. His appearance is the source of constant amusement for these people; not knowing better they talk to him as if he was a grown up and they call him “Tiny User”. Sam does not get it, but he is happier now than he has been for very long time.

Most importantly, they are together with Daddy. There are no phone calls, no sudden disappearances; little Sam does not wake up to find that Dad left for yet another meeting. Here he is not cold or hot, he is never sick: there is a constant balance as if the whole place was built to keep them safe. They play, they run, they travel around in those shiny vehicles – and sometimes there is danger

~~system error~~

and they run away from a collapsing building and a crew comes to contain the malfunction, but little Sam does not feel unsafe. He is learning, he is making friends. At the end they always go home, get in their beds and in the morning the whole adventure feels like a dream. But it is more than a dream; they are finally together and they are in charge: if there is an accident, Daddy will take a disk and fix the damage, heal the wounded people and everything becomes perfect again.

Later Sam would not remember when he met Tron for the first time. Tron is always around in the city and often, when there is disturbance, little Sam sees somebody from the distance, clearing the area and ushering people into safety. He does not quite remember any formal introduction; once they are together it feels like they were like this forever and he can not quite imagine it being any other way.

Above and below, up and down, waking up in his bed to yet another morning when Daddy would be away and he would be watching television until Grandma or a babysitter would take him to the park. Little Sam is not supposed to talk about the Arcade and even if he wanted; what could he tell? But in the evening he gets dressed and ready to go even before it is time. He does not know, but he is being digitized into a computer every day; his cells become numbers when he enters and upon departure the codes become the blood in his veins, the marrow in his bones. _He is becoming_.

One night at the Arcade little Sam is tired after running around for long. He did not get his nap during the day and now he crawls on the floor at Daddy’s place. Dad got busy with work and he left earlier, leaving Sam with Tron. Tron is not quite sure why Sam became slow and fussy, but he lays motionlessly on the floor when little Sam climbs across his chest and falls asleep.

When little Sam awakens, he feels the constant rumble of the machine under his face. He lifts his head and looks at Tron, who has been laying there awake, but motionless to avoid disturbing the child’s sleep. Sam puts his hand on Tron’s chest, on the black suit and he feels the static rumble under his fingers instead of a heartbeat. The child looks into Tron’s face and he understands it for the first time that he is not looking at a human being. Sam looks into this youthful face and he suddenly remembers Uncle Alan; with growing consciousness he recognizes that this face will not get old and Tron would not die from old age. They, the child and the program are looking at each other without ever breaking eye contact. In that moment Sam understands that his mother is gone for good and will not come back; and that at the same time she will never actually leave him. And little Sam cries: not the tears of a child, but those of real mourning. He then falls asleep again; that day he begins healing.

He is locked in the body of a three year old; but due to the time he spends in the computer, his mind is developing faster than his body. ‘Hyperlexia’ a doctor tells his father and Dad brings Sam home in an unusual, somber mode, knowing that the child did not develop the ability to read at three out of nowhere, but he was taught to read by programs in the system.

One night little Sam is walking on the digital streets with his program friends when he sees his father on the other side of the road. He runs there in an attempt to surprise him and when he grabs his hand, Daddy looks down at him with genuine surprise on his face. From his expression Sam can tell that Dad is ~~not Dad~~ very angry and he lets go off his hand immediately. One of his friends runs there, picks him up and carries him away quickly.

Another night they are at Dad’s place and Sam is playing a board game with Tron. They are sitting on the floor with the board between them. Dad comes in and sits down in an armchair behind Tron. Without looking the programs leans backwards; Dad’s hand comes to a rest on Tron’s nape and the program’s face lights up with happiness.

At the end they go home. When they exit, Sam turns around and he looks at the computer. They are standing in the dark office and Dad looks at little Sam, who is still watching the machine. In that moment Sam realizes that their adventures are taking place inside of the computer and catching Dad’s eyes he knows that Dad is now aware of his newfound knowledge.

IV.

Kids forget fast. When Dad stops taking little Sam to the Grid, it takes only a few tearful weeks until he accepts that the secret empire under the Arcade merely exists in his dreams. By the time he is four he is an active child far beyond other kids at the same age with keen interest in computers. By five he reads, writes and studies middle school level mathematics and he dreams with the Grid every night.

When he is six, Dad disappears.

Kids forget. Sam does not remember Mommy or the Grid anymore; he only feels the black hole where _something_ has been and he is mad at his father for going away. The police and the private investigators come back empty handed and the adults around Sam say that they have to figure out a way to live without him.

He rebels. He goes to school and gets expelled; he rides his bike until he falls and breaks a bone. Time goes by and Dad does not come back; Sam gives up for the sake of his grandparents and Uncle Alan. He goes back to school and becomes an expert of computers; he travels the world, but he never finds anything resembling to the neon-lit darkness of the system. So he goes home and settles down, even if settling down for him means to move into a remote container house and to live off his father’s company, the corporation by which he is equally intrigued and annoyed.

Visiting his mother’s grave he bursts out in tears; inexplicably he reacts the same way when he sees Uncle Alan’s old graduation picture during a family gathering. He goes out to pull a prank on his father’s company every year; he parachutes down from a roof and gets arrested. He bails out and goes home.

“Why are you here, Alan?” he asks when his old friend comes by that night.

“I was paged last night,” Alan says, pulling out the device from his pocket.

“Oh, man,” Sam laughs. “Still rocking the pager? Good for you.”

“Yeah… Your dad once told me I had to sleep with it and I still do.”

Alan’s smile becomes somber.

“Page came from your dad’s office at the Arcade,” he says. Sam stops grinning as well.

“So?” he asks.

“So?” Alan asks back. “That number’s been disconnected for twenty years.”

Sam does not react. There is a fear building up inside him; it comes from the long-buried knowledge of the Arcade, from the realization that the years of waiting will end tonight.

“Sam, two nights before he disappeared, he came to my house. ‘I’ve cracked it,’ he kept saying. He was talking about genetic algorithms, quantum teleportation. He said he was about to change everything. Science, medicine, religion. He wouldn’t have left that, Sam,” Alan says, sitting down next to Sam on the sofa. “He wouldn’t have left you.”

Sam jumps on his feet.

“Oh, Alan,” he exclaims. “You’re the only one that still believes that. He’s either dead or chilling in Costa Rica. Probably both. Look, I’m sorry. I’m tired and I smell like jail. Let’s just reconvene in another couple of years, huh? What do you say?”

Alan takes out the keys from his pocket.

“Here,” he says. “These are the keys to the Arcade. I haven’t gone over there yet. I thought you should be the one.”

“Alan, you’re acting like I’m gonna find him sitting there, working. Just, ‘Hey, kiddo. Lost track of time.’”

Alan throws the key to him and Sam catches it.

“Wouldn’t that be something?” Alan asks and he leaves.

Sam rides his bike to the Arcade. He leaves the vehicle on the empty street and opens the abandoned Arcade with the key. Inside everything is dark and dusty and the gaming machines are covered with plastic. He turns on the lights; the switch also turns on the machines and the music. Sam goes upstairs and he finds the lounge area deserted. He comes downstairs and gets ready to leave. He looks aside and his eyes catch something… The TRON sign and the gaming machine under that. He thinks it is the nostalgia that brings him there, what makes him walk to the machine. He pulls off the plastic and looks at the screen, where two lightcycles are chasing each other. Sam pulls out a quarter from his pocket and slides it into the slot. The coin goes in and then falls out from the machine, onto the floor. Sam crouches down to pick it up and he finds scratch marks on the floor; the marks implicate that the machine has been regularly turned aside. Sam straightens himself, grabs the gaming machine and turns it, revealing the door behind.

He goes downstairs and the music fades away. Down there he finds another door with the key left inside. Sam goes in and finds the downstairs office. He still does not remember, but he knows the place. He explores the room as if he would do it for the first time, when he sits down at the computer he unknowingly mimics his father’s motions. He thinks he is clueless when he fumbles with the computer directory, trying to open the door he walked through so many times. When Sam pushes the right button and the laser hits him, he does not only become digitized and taken to the Grid.

He is going home.


End file.
